I write this with great anticipation- tomorrow morning I take off to Kyrgyzstan with 9 others! There is so much anticipation that I'm actually finding it difficult to put into words... Hillary, speechless?! I know, it's a little difficult for me to grasp, too ;)
When I last wrote you, I shared a deep part of my heart. A conviction really that the Holy Spirit placed in my heart. Thank you for allowing me to be transparent and responding like so many of you have.
It has been in these last 5 weeks that the Lord has continued to speak. He has removed fear and worry of travel, safety, Savannah & Allan's care and replaced them with straight confirmation. From words in the book I'm reading (Crazy Love by Francis Chan), to every.single.sermon our Pastor has preached, to orchestrating Savannah's care, Allan's work schedule, and finances. God has proven daily that THIS trip, this assignment to Kyrgyzstan is one He is calling me to. He just needed me to say YES.
I've also learned a lot about myself and my personal relationship with Jesus Christ these last 5 weeks. In reading Crazy Love, this is what the Lord has revealed to me - The Lord has given me the desires of my heart to be a wife and a mother but they are not mine. They do not belong to me. My role here on earth may be to take care of them and serve them but my ULTIMATE purpose on earth is to expand the Kingdom and be Kingdom focused. When I stand before the Lord, all the nice things people have to say about me will not matter. What will matter is what I did to expand the Kingdom and share the message of Salvation to those around me. How I served others, loved others, and gave God all of myself and my heart.
Here are some quotes from Crazy Love that convicted my heart, made me rethink my personal relationship with the Lord, and re-evaluate-
"On the average day, we live caught up in ourselves. On the average day, we don't consider God very much. On the average day. we forget that our life truly is a vapor." ( pg. 41)
"Why are we so quick to forget God? Who do we think we are?... Evein though I glimpse God's holiness, I am still dumb enough to forget that life is all about God and not about me at all." (pg. 44)
"From start to finish this life is about God. He is the main character. How is it possible that we live as though it is about us?
In the presence of God, He gives us a deeper peace and joy that transcends it all. (pg. 46)
"Why, when we constantly offend Him and are so unloveable and unloving, does God persist in loving us?" (pg. 61)
"The irony is that while God doesn't need us but still wants us, we desperately need God but don't really want Him most of the time." (pg. 63)
"Our love for Him always comes out of His love for us. Do you love this God who is everything, or do you just love everything He gives you? Do you really know and believe that God loves you, individually and personally and intimately? Do you see and know Him as Abba, Father?" (pg. 64)
"We could die at any moment and generally think our puny lives are pretty sweet compared to loving Him, yet He persists in loving us with unending, outrageous love." (pg. 65)
"Jesus's call to commitment is clear: He wants all or nothing. The thought of a person calling himself a "Christian" without being a devoted follower of Christ is absurd." (pg. 85)
"In the midst of our failed attempts at loving Jesus, His grace covers us." (pg. 87)
"God wants our best, deserves our best, and demands our best... It's easy to fill ourselves up with other things and then give God whatever is left... Leftovers are not merely inadequate; from God's point of view, they're evil. God is holy. This holy God deserves excellence, the very best I have." (pg. 90/91)
"If life is a river, then pursing Christ requires swimming upstream. When we stop swimming, or actively following Him, we automatically begin to be swept downstream." (pg. 94)
"Many of us believe we have as much of God as we want right now, a reasonable portion of God among all the other things in our lives. Most of our thoughts are centered on money we want to make, the school we want to attend, the body we aspire to have, the spouse we want to marry, the kind of person we want to become... But the fact is that NOTHING should concern us more than our relationship with God; it's about eternity, and nothing compare to that. God is not someone who can be tacked on to our lives." (pg. 96)
"Are you willing to say to God that He can have whatever He wants? Do you believe that wholehearted commitment to Him is more important than any other thing or person in your life? Do you know that nothing you do in this life will ever matter, unless it is about loving God and loving the people He has made?" (pg. 97)
I highly suggest reading this book - it is excellent!
Questions Answered:
I seem to be getting the same questions so here are some answers to the common questions I've been asked:
1) Where in the World is Kyrgyzstan?!
It is central Asia, boarders China but is Russian speaking. They are approx. 11 hours ahead of us, which works out nicely. So when you're waking up to start your day, I'll be wrapping that day up!
2) What are you going to do for food and workout?! For those of you secretly laughing because I won't have a gym or meal planning/prep: No worries! I've packed T25 (if someone brings a laptop) and if no access to that, I have created 3 different training sessions to rotate through each morning using my body weight. Food wise I have packed lots of unsalted fruit & nut mixes, dried coconut and mango slices (no sugar added), Shakeology, Quest Bars and chips, Wild Planet tuna, whole wheat pita bread, Justin's Almond butter, and some organic veggie & kale chips to make sure I get my veggies in! So I have meal planned/prepped in a way - Fail to plan, plan to fail... RIGHT Challengers?!
3) Updates and/or Internet Access?!
We will be staying in an apartment with wi-fi connection. My hope is to post at least a picture and quick update each day with what we did, God moments, prayer requests, and so on to my FB account! If I get time to blog, I'll post it on FB as well.
Our Pastor will be posting Twitter updates, if you'd like to get those you can follow: AP Ministries @CincyAP
The Missionaries we will be serving alongside have a blog. They will be posting updates as well - feel free to check those out at: actofkindness.blogspot.com
4) Where'd my donation go?!
Donation Details:
Would you believe that we have had so many people give to this trip, we are trying to figure out how to get the rest of the donations over! What an AMAZING problem to have...right?!
Those of you who donated physically: I was able to fill 2 medium size suitcases with everything you gave! Diapers, baby clothing, underwear, Children’s Tylenol, Zinc, Multi vitamins for kids and adults, Vitamin C& D, anti-bacterial cream, and coffee!
To those of you who donated financially: I was able to purchase my flight, lots of coffee for the missionaries (which is HUGE because there is not coffee available to them... can you believe that?!), newborn diapers, bubbles, toy cars for the boys, and play jewelry for the girls. It will also take care of the cost for the 2 extra suitcases full of donations. I will also be carrying a significant amount of extra money to give to whatever any immediate needs may be while we are there.
Because of your obedience and sacrifice to give, there will be opportunities to bless many and meet needs...Do you know how huge that is?
5) What are you going to do in Kyrgyzstan?
We've got a jam packed schedule which is beyond exciting for me!We will be visiting the lost mountain village of Kashka
to have a Christmas party and deliver Samaritan purse boxes to approx 50 kids. Help out on the farm with kids from an orphanage. We will be
playing with the
kids and the animals as well as making the forms for the foundation for the
barn, and putting
up a fence around the garden and
painting the house. Go to the hot springs
for a swim :) Go to a men’s home, pour the foundation
for the barn and continue painting the house. Fishing. Go to a homeless shelter and the women’s shelter at the farm and the seniors home . Deliver food to the families at the dump. Visit the seniors home. Work at the Medical Clinic at the Baby Hospital, get a tour of the hospital, and pick up supplies and food for the baby orphanage, take some of the children from an orphanage to the Russian Ballet.
Thank you so much for your prayers, support, encouragement and for partnering with me in this mission!
